Monday, January 29, 2024

Looking For Someone To Eat

I finished Reading M. Scott Peck's book, "The Road Less Traveled" and in it he said, "Mental Health is dedication to reality at all costs." When I read that line I knew we were kindred spirits.

I hate lies and delusions. Passionately. One drum that we beat endlessly with our kids is, "Tell the truth - at all costs - come what may. Operate in truth." Truth and reality are the same thing. And this is good news for us because Jesus is The Truth (John 14:6). 

What I've noticed is that we don't talk about Satan much either in the church or outside of it. Last week I was reading a blog where the author was writing some of their experiences with the Adversary and how to detect and fight against Satan and his minions. Then some of the comments below the post were along the lines of, "I don't want to know about Satan - I want to know more about the Holy Ghost and who he is!" 

I grit my teeth and swear when I read stuff like that. 

Here in lies one of the biggest failures among us Christians. The mentality is that yeah, sure - Satan is there, off in the periphery, and we just need to focus on doing good things and study our scriptures and pray and stay focused on keeping the Spirit to be with us and we will be okay.

I pound my fist on the table and say these next things!!!




You have an enemy. 


I have seen numerous people leave God and leave Jesus - especially in the last two years. People who believed like you and me and were actively seeking the path that led to the iron rod. But lest ye forget - in Lehi's dream, what came after people found the path?

The mists of darkness.

And do we just want to ignore that and say, "Tell me more about that iron rod? I don't want to focus or give any attention to the mists! I just want to study the rod and how to hang on."




You have an enemy.

Let's look more closely at Lehi's dream. 

21 And I saw numberless concourses of people, many of whom were pressing forward, that they might obtain the path which led unto the tree by which I stood.

22 And it came to pass that they did come forth, and commence in the path which led to the tree.

23 And it came to pass that there arose a mist of darkness; yea, even an exceedingly great mist of darkness, insomuch that they who had commenced in the path did lose their way, that they wandered off and were lost.
I am so passionate about this. When you underestimate the Devil - you do so at your own peril. You think those mists aren't of equal importance to the iron rod in your journey to the tree?

You discovered the corruption of the church and found the path to the Tree of Life, yes! But that's only HALF of the situation you now find yourself in and if you don't pay attention to those mists, you wont even know you're full on in one. You'll get confused, turned around in your thinking, stopped from progressing and before you know it you'll see daylight and believe you're back on track and behold - you're lost! 

And the thing I've been trying to accept (that I don't want to accept) and gets me fired up is this: that some people want to be lost. They want to say that they've tried getting on the path to the Tree (i.e. they've done the prayer thing and God doesn't answer and so they're moving on). Some people want to be in an unhealthy relationship with a group or a people or even no one at all. They love the 'familiar'. It's too hard to continue on when it's so foggy you can't remember or see what you were pressing towards in the first place.

These feelings are by design and you are not alone in them. 

Now the serpent was more cunning than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. (Gen 3:1)

A few years ago we often held gatherings with friends in our home where we could study the scriptures and pray together. Each time we hosted the prayer group in our home the sheer amount of bad things that would happen were undeniable. We were almost always spiritually limping and dragging a dead leg (like a zombie) to answer the door for the gathering. Over time we began to understand what was happening - it was a battle to stop what we were about to do. Usually at the gathering I would mention the battle our family took to get there and others would mention the battles they had to get to our house.

One day I had a friend call to let me know that it sure seemed like I was "battling" all the time and I must be doing something wrong. They felt that life isn't supposed to like that and I'm inviting a "battle" into my world because I was thinking thoughts or doing things that were inviting battles into my sphere. I listened and thanked them for their perspective and we ended the call. 

This friend didn't like to focus on the devil and Satan wasn't a thought in their brain. 

Want to know where this friend is today on their journey to the Tree of Life? 

They don't believe in God anymore.


Yeah, no. It's not. 

If you struggle with prayer and getting answers, you are interacting with demons. If you struggle to get revelation - demons. If you struggle to daily operate in reality and tell the truth at all costs, demons. If you think it's the "leftists" that are delusional and living and loving a lie - think again. The scary thing, more than green hair and women's rights, is that you're not just influenced by demons - but you're actively keeping them with you. 

Prayer, revelation, and operating in reality are seemingly "basic" things that we must persistently work on learning. The devil's foolery is that they aren't basic at all. They are PhD level classes touted by corrupt professors as "basic," "entry level" courses that anyone can take and pass easily. 

This deception has led many to become discouraged and drop out entirely and thereby left to inadvertently acquire an education elsewhere.

If you are going to partake of the fruit of the Tree of Life, then you must battle the mists. Light from the Son is the only thing that will burn up the mist. 

Your journey will require you to rely on the word of God (i.e. iron rod, i.e. personal revelation) to dispel the mists of darkness surrounding you. 

But you must recognize and admit that you are IN the mist.

You WILL have a battle/mist.

There is no prophet or person who has experienced partaking of the Love of God that didn't have their insides ripped through to get there.

Satan attacks reality. He attacks Truth. Commit to operating in reality - in Truth - At.All.Costs.

So the great dragon was cast out, that serpent of old, called the Devil and Satan, who deceives the whole world; he was cast to the earth, and his angels were cast out with him. (Revelation 12:9)


Let me give an example of what it looks like to battle the adversary.

When President Nelson was called as Prophet I realized I'd never actually prayed to know if someone was a prophet or not. I just always assumed they were and sustained them accordingly. But I had a friend encourage me and Ryan to pray and get an answer so I could sustain President Nelson with honesty rather than by default. Ryan agreed we should get a confirmation and so we both fasted and prayed and received no answer. So we fasted a second day and prayed and no answer. This happened for four days.

On the fourth day we were kneeling in the living room after the kids had gone to bed and we were praying together. The prayer felt very stifled and after we'd prayed for some time I commented to Ryan that the prayer always felt like it wasn't reaching beyond the room. He said he felt the same way. We prayed again - this time something happened. As Ryan prayed I was in my body or out (2 Cor. 12:2) I don't know but I was looking down below at the two of us kneeling in prayer. I have never experienced this before. I looked around and I saw demons making a solid dome over us as we prayed. Nothing we said was ascending because it couldn't! When we finished the second prayer I told him what I saw.

Then he said that he kept remembering a talk President Nelson gave when he was 'Elder Nelson' and in that talk Elder Nelson said, "Our sustaining of prophets is a personal commitment that we will do our utmost to uphold their prophetic priorities. Our sustaining is an oath-like indication that we recognize their calling as a prophet to be legitimate and binding upon us." (link) Ryan wondered about making an, "oath that binds you" to uphold someone's priorities. He kept thinking those words weren't something he'd read in the scriptures. He had the thought that when he automatically sustained President Nelson when he was called as prophet that he had possibly made an inappropriate "binding oath" to President Nelson rather than to the Lord.

We prayed again and asked the Lord to break any inappropriate oaths we had unknowingly made that were keeping us from hearing His voice. After that prayer the answer came for both of us that President Nelson was not a prophet. I know there are millions of people who likely prayed and received a very different answer about President Nelson. One might ask me, "who do you think you are to be this lone person who didn't get the obvious answer?" My answer is - I don't think I'm anybody. I was just seeking an answer, I was sincere in my heart. I fasted and prayed for many days and that was the answer that came.

The night that Ryan and I prayed and received the answer about President Nelson, I had a dream; "or in other words, I have seen a vision" (1 Ne. 8:2). I hesitate to share this for fear of judgment by some who read this post but as I've prayed about it, I felt it was okay to share.

In the dream I was in a typical LDS chapel standing next to the podium. I was standing near President Nelson who was on the stand and there was a line of people waiting to shake his hand. I watched him shake a little child's hand and he held it in his own hand and was very tender with the child, taking extra time to smile at them and hold his other hand on top of theirs. I remember thinking in my dream that he looked almost Grandmotherly in the care he took with the child. As I watched that interaction, suddenly President Nelson's spirit came out of his body and stood in front of me. It was dark and out of his mouth came a vine that shot towards me. The image and the vine frightened me so much that I began stumbling backwards trying to get away from the moving vine. As I reached the point where I nearly fell backwards to the ground - two hands steadied my body. On my right I looked and saw the Savior. On my left I looked and saw Ryan. They both looked forward to the vine that was advancing towards me and the Lord said not to be afraid of it and that I could stop it. So I reached my hand forward and gently pushed the vine away from me. Then I woke up.

I believe and I know that Satan can give visions and dreams. Satan can mimic light and even appear as an angel of light. Only discernment will help you through the things you dream, see, hear, and feel. 

Why did I share this with you today? Because it took FOUR days of prayer and fasting to get one.simple.answer about a seemingly simple question!!! And even then - it was capped by demons! You ignore Satan at your peril. You underplay his powers to your damnation. You want Truth, right? You want Jesus, yes? You want to hear His voice, yeah? Then you MUST battle through the mists of darkness. There is no other way!!!
“Through his cunning he shall cause deceit to prosper under his rule; And he shall exalt himself in his heart. He shall destroy many in their prosperity. He shall even rise against the Prince of princes;" (Dan. 8:25)
My husband and I started on this path by waking up to the corruption of the Government. Once our eyes were opened to that corruption then it became easier to see the corruption within the church. The problem is that it is so easy, so natural to become prideful when we see the corruption (raising hand emoji insert here). But make no mistake - recognizing the corruption is only half of the issue. The rest of the issue, the most important side of the issue, lies in the Being and Beings who blinded us in the first place.

If you aren't sensing a frequent spiritual battle, you may be right where Satan wants you to be. If you struggle to pray and receive revelation - that's your first indicator that something has infiltrated your skull-sized government and is working to keep you corrupted - asleep at the battle's edge. Your prayer life (or lack thereof) is an excellent barometer for the reality of what is lurking in the hallways of your soul. 

Each of these demons has a name. If you are to be granted dominion over the beasts of the field, then you name them (Gen. 2:19). 

And how do you name them? 

You have to be able to pray and receive revelation so you can discern their names and then - in prayer, you name them and, through the Lord, you cast them out. 

Learn to pray.

Ask for the gift of Discernment.

Then begin naming the demon beasts so you can have dominion over them - through prayer and learning directly from the Lord how to cast it or them out.

Have you not watched "The Hobbit" or "Lord of the Rings" in a while? Watch the Queen Galadriel and Gandalf work together to cast out the evil. Watch Gandalf repeatedly trust his 'gut' and watch as it leads him to the people he is to surround himself with and where to go. We are fooling ourselves there isn't a battle as great as that.

A recent podcast said - the war we are engaged in now is for Intimacy with God. Sadly, we are more often intimate with our phones or technology than we are with the One who gave us breath and is sustaining us from moment to moment.

We were designed for Intimacy with God. John Eldredge said, “Every song you love, every memory you cherish, every moment that has moved you to holy tears has been given to you from the One who has been pursuing you from your first breath in order to win your heart.”

Do you want your heart to be won by Him...or has another person or fascination taken the throne on your heart?

Are you obsessed with something right now that takes up your free time when you're not having to work or attend to daily tasks? Ask in prayer, "Lord - what has captured my heart that isn't You?"

Demons cap your prayers. So you have to learn to pray. How? You tell the Lord, in prayer, that you need help. Ask Him to teach you to pray. Learn the language of the scriptures and then watch as it becomes your language. I fully love and support the Wild At Heart ministry. They focus on helping you to have intimacy with God and they have transformed my life. They are humble and wise. They want to create warriors, not little disciples that follow them. They have very powerful prayers that can help you as you are learning the new language of prayer that can be found here

The church hardly teaches about prayer. And these new groups that are rising up don't instruct or focus on prayer either. 

Just to find pictures for this post was interesting in and of itself. The artwork portraying interactions with demons or the devil are centuries old. We have forgotten. The devil has lured us into a slumber.
22 And behold, others he flattereth away, and telleth them there is no hell; and he saith unto them: I am no devil, for there is none—and thus he whispereth in their ears, until he grasps them with his awful chains, from whence there is no deliverance.

23 Yea, they are grasped with death, and hell; and death, and hell, and the devil, and all that have been seized therewith must stand before the throne of God, and be judged according to their works, from whence they must go into the place prepared for them, even a lake of fire and brimstone, which is endless torment. (2 Nephi 28)
Prayer is the foundation for anyone desiring to connect with the Lord. What does the group you follow focus on? A temple? The Covenant Path? A set of scriptures? Joseph Smith? The Davidic Servant? Zion?

If the focus isn't on your personal intimacy with God - you have a counterfeit group.

If the focus isn't on how to personally connect with the Lord without the assistance of a leader to intervene in your behalf - you have false teachers under influence of familiar spirits. 


And deep down you have to ask yourself - when did a group become more important than Jesus?

When did collectively feeling our way towards some great and spacious "Zionistic-end-goal" become more important than the Intimacy that comes via ascending the Holy Mount and finding God at the top? 

Some of you may be saying, "I've done the prayer thing. I don't get answers. I don't hear the Lord. I'm just trying my best to be a good person and make good choices." John Eldredge said, “Don't let your experience of God up to this point limit what you might enjoy with him in the coming years.”

If you have felt skunked by the Lord in the past - forgive yourself and forgive Him. He's not ghosting you. He said, "ask, seek, and knock". 

"Ask, Seek, and Knock" reveals that there is a process involved. Buy this book and read or listen to it - it will bless you immensely on your journey to the Lord: Walking with God by John Eldredge 

Let me share another part of my process in coming to the Lord. When we first started waking up I was obsessed with finding the Lord - face to face. I would often wake up at 3am and go and kneel in my living room and just let Jesus know, enthusiastically, I was ready to meet Him! I was, perhaps, very childish in my understanding and approach. But in time - that childlike approach helped me a great deal. 

One night during this time - I had a dream. In that dream I saw a small 3D stone church. It looked centuries old and my eyes were able to zoom in and see and hear the stone slowly crumbling and falling off the church. 

In the dream a voice said, "What you know of the church has changed. Now you must build from what you know."

I was handed a miniature set of walls and windows and roof to build a little 3D model of a church. I worked for what felt like hours trying to get a single wall to stand up without falling back down. In desperation I cried to the Lord that I could not build it and I needed help! 

Then an open set of scriptures appeared in front of me and out arose the words, "Line upon line, precept upon precept." In the dream I passionately said that I wanted to see the Lord - to see His face! A woman appeared (I think I shared this in another post) who was very worldly. I left the room and went to another room. Sensing a presence I turned and - there she was again! Annoyed I left and went to another room. This happened four times - always the same woman just staring at me. In frustration I called out to the Lord and asked why I could not see Him. He said, "You are too much in the world to approach Me at this time." And He was right. I had much to lay on the altar before I could approach the Throne for a face to face encounter as I was desiring. 

But the blessed news was that I was not too much in the world to approach Him as one humbly desiring a greater Intimacy with Him. 

And neither are you. 

All are invited to come.

23 And that which doth not edify is not of God, and is darkness.

24 That which is of God is light; and he that receiveth light, and continueth in God, receiveth more light; and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the perfect day.

25 And again, verily I say unto you, and I say it that you may know the truth, that you may chase darkness from among you (
D&C 50)

Two key words in those verses are that you 1. Receive the light and then you 2. "Continue in God". Then, and only then, do you receive more light and that grows brighter and brighter. But you have to continue in God. And that is no easy task. It requires repetitive and difficult work like: Asking (again and again), seeking (over and over), knocking (repetitive action). 

If you are after "the Perfect Day" - then start on your knees

Learn how to Pray. 

Learn how to Hear. 

Learn how to make mistakes. 

You will fall down.

Learn how to pick yourself up and try again. 

Stumble upward toward the Light. 

Hungry for the Truth? 

Had enough of the drama and the smoke and mirrors? 

Seek He who is Truth and you will be lead to Him. 

Have nothing but an "eye single to His glory" and you will reach the Tree of Life.

And if you aren't seeking for that Perfect Day anymore all I can say is:




Who the hell do you think got you to give up seeking The Truth?




I had a dream last month. In the dream I was at a gathering of people who had left the church and were seeking for more. The gathering was outside and one of my sons came up to me with a group of boys his age and he said, "They want me to come and hear about Joseph Smith and they promised ice cream." 

I went to the outdoor theater where people were gathering to hear the desired preacher. He began to speak and I found myself in a bed with cozy blankets and I began to fall asleep at his words. It was when he said we no longer needed to seek an intimate relationship with Jesus that my ears awoke. I sat up straight and scowled at him and shook my head "no"! I went to the stand and began to pound the pulpit and bawl in my dream as I shouted that we should not stop seeking Jesus!!! Then I awoke to a tear soaked face. Don't fall asleep at the words of another. 

Awake to Jesus! 

Seek Him. 

EXPECT familiar spirits to accompany you. 


EXPECT familiar spirits to accompany leaders and members in the church and in the movements you participate in. 


Those familiar spirits are the mists and they are familiar because the temptations and thoughts used against you will have a familiarity to them. They seem righteous or seem to make sense, yet they are not. These spirits will appeal to your pride, comfort, and false traditions. They are the most dangerous and are the most common spirits you will experience in your journey to the Lord 


7 But ye are commanded in all things to ask of God, who giveth liberally; and that which the Spirit testifies unto you even so I would that ye should do in all holiness of heart, walking uprightly before me, considering the end of your salvation, doing all things with prayer and thanksgiving, that ye may not be seduced by evil spirits, or doctrines of devils, or the commandments of men; for some are of men, and others of devils.

8 Wherefore, beware lest ye are deceived; and that ye may not be deceived seek ye earnestly the best gifts, always remembering for what they are given; (D&C 46)

Those scriptures command you to ask God what to do so that you won't be deceived either by evil spirits, false doctrine, or the words of men (and women). Then it tells you to seek earnestly the best gifts. 

To me, the best gift we can ask for is the gift of Discernment. But don't stop there - ask for the gift of Prayer. Seek for the gift of revelation/hearing the Lord's voice. Maybe those seem boring but the more you have of those three - the more clearly you will see through the mists and the more exciting everything becomes. The adventure starts with discernment. You won't know true exhilaration until you 1. recognize you have a dark spirit trailing you and 2. you fight to know the name of the demon is and then, to receive the name through revelation from Jesus Christ - 3. cast it out. 

Pray. Start there. And continue in prayer. And keep going to prayer. And let your mind run to prayer. And let Jesus be your North Star. Look to Him, aim for Him, never stop returning your thoughts to Him. 

So, if you want - download those prayers from the Wild at Heart ministry that I linked above (or I linked them here for those of you that don't want to scroll to find it again), get in a quiet place, push play on this song and start praying out loud. The pre-written prayers are like math equations. People at PhD levels of math have found ways to pray that get things solved. You can balk at a written prayer or you can pray for humility and consider that someone has something to teach you.

What do you have to lose? Oh, just that demon that's been so close and always "has your back".

Arrival of the Birds


I want to add more about honesty. There are many of you caught in a bind on what to do about something important in your life. As always, take the Holy Spirit to be your guide. The words written here are for helping people in their journey to overcome the demons and familiar spirits attached to them.